Why? Why? Why?

Well, I am having a bad day. Its a long story but the short of it is that I worked for a company that couldn't pay me, then quit there and have not been able to find a job. Consequently, a lot of my bills have been late and my credit rating has plummeted...its an awful feeling when you have had perfect credit your whole life and suddenly you are what I'd be willing to bet the collections people call "dirt". But I'm NOT dirt! I'm just going through a difficult time and know that someday soon it will be better. Guess what? They dont care! They just want their money, which they were so eager to give you the use of all these years. And after things go along with this love/hate relationship for about 90 days, guess what else? They sell you off to the scum of the earth - collections people...oh I mean the dirt of the earth...no sense name calling. These people will hound you if they have a phone number. They'll pretend to be lawyers, your friends, I even had one that left a message saying there's a problem with your child at school, you need to call me right back...it was amazing. They'll do ANYTHING to get the money that you formally owed to someone else. I have since become rather callous to it all, except when you work out a "plan" with one of them and then another person from their office calls you to harass you. Its as though the one hand doesnt know what the other is doing, so you than wonder, well if I dont pay it, will they notice?? You bet! Both hands will!! I've cried about it, I've laughed about it, I've joked about it, but at the end of the day, its a pretty horrible feeling. You do FEEL like dirt. Its like when you did something as a child that disappointed your Mother and you cant take it back. Its the very same feeling. Even though, essentially, its not 100% your fault, although you did borrow the money, you know in your heart you have every intention of paying it back. Guess what? They dont care about that either, that feeling in your heart, they just want you to give them their money. I've learned a lot over the past year or so of going through this and while some of the lessons have been very good (learned how NOT to use a credit card and to always pay cash for everything, I still feel somehow betrayed by my creditors. They LOVED me when I spent the money and encouraged me to spend more (raised credit limits, gave me balance transfer deals), but now I feel in a way like I've lost a friend but also found out they werent really my friend in the first place. Its somewhat like when you're young and you first learn that people arent always what you think. So I suppose this kid is a little disappointed too.